I figured out that I don’t want to write a lot of words…at least not at this point (and what is “a lot” really?). I think I’m afraid that I won’t be grammatically correct or as faintly eloquent as I want to be or as cohesive & conclusive as my colleagues and relatives. I am randomly predisposed to ramble, start in the middle and go all over the page like an ant searching for crumbs. I know I am capable of composing a piece of writing with one of those topic sentences that clearly states the purpose of the piece, yet 
the problem with the flow of this entire blog is that I feel squished from both sides. On the one hand, I feel I SHOULD and OUGHT TO compose a comprehensive essay each time I post. On the other hand, I am drawn towards allowing this to be a genuine journal, with the requisite informality and revelatory novice auteur gushing. In my best Woody Allenesque form, I fret incessantly about revealing too much, as one is apt to do as a diarist. The result of all this neurotic confusion is that Nothing Happens. I haven’t produced any blog entries for months and months and months! So…What to do??
I still have no decision on this issue except to keep trying. In the writing classes I have taken (hard to believe but yes, I have taken some writing classes…) there is always an emphasis on knowing and addressing the “audience.” I have a problem with it here in blogdom because the audience is potentially EVERYONE IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE. Makes it hard to hone in on one demographic. So it’s a decision: I’ll continue searching for my blog voice and identity, and YOU can weigh in and reassure me I should continue to speculate in my own juices. I think we have a deal.
StudioSuzesque: Works on So Many Levels 
It seems like I can only write coherently when I don’t really care what I’m writing. If I actually give a damn it’s just a random ramble. It is a curse.
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Yes! I am having trouble deciding how polished and formal to make each entry. I just wrote another entry this evening where I decided to do what I call ramblewrite which is VERY informal. So maybe we have different definitions of rambling or maybe rambling isn’t good OR bad…just O.K.
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When I ramble it is just pretty scatterbrained. It is hard to find a unified thought.
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i really relate! i think about blogging every day but feel i can’t do it justice so it slips away, and then there’s nothing to show for it. is that better than doing a point-form half-assed job? i don’t know! but i like your approach. and i like the ants. also the aunts.
funny, though – i haven’t taken many writing classes but in the gazillion interviews i’ve listened to, the prevailing wisdom is DON’T think of your audience! they say write for yourself and people will like it if they like it. i think both are true to a certain degree. depends on the context. in the blogdom, i think if you write something, the audience who wants it can find it, but you don’t have to target anyone. unless you want to.
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